My Smile

Posted on December 29, 2009. Filed under: Poetry | Tags: , , , , |

It slowly faded with time.
The hurt was too much to withstand.

Like a puppy waiting on its master;
I’d get excited at the prospect of even seeing you.

The ups were floored by the downs.
A glimpse, any sign of like was enough.

Like a baby waiting on a bottle;
I’d anticipate your arrival, your phone call; Just your text.
What a joke.

You weren’t right.
You weren’t whole.
So you ended up taking…
Wait, no.
Let’s be honest;
I let you take pieces of me to make you whole.

You made the whole me cry.
You made the whole me sad.
You made the whole me give and give some more,
Until there was no whole me left.

The lies, truth be told, were expected.
Why would I be surprised?

I never truly understood why.
Sadly, I don’t care.

No, the real sweet sadness in this story of you,
Is that I never smiled until I let you go.

©

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3 Responses to “My Smile”

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the concept of wholeness really made me sit up and think:

“You made the whole me sad.
You made the whole me give and give some more,
Until there was no whole me left.”

i think there’s hidden beauty in that concept of sharing your own wholeness with the person you love and them giving you pieces of themselves to replace what you’ve given them and it is truly quite sad when they don’t give but only take, take, take.

Thank you so much for your comment.

You’re right. It’s so sad to give so much.
To love in hope of a fair exchange.

Love is nourishing someone so they have enough to nourish you right back and so on.

How can you give if you have nothing left to give??

I used to think unrequited love was the worst. But honestly, at least with unrequited love, you know exactly where you stand.
But actually being in love with someone who gives far less, leaving you virtually crippled, is the worst pain.

x


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